I remember this event exactly: 7 December 1986, Grabowa and Oasis of New Life of the first degree. Before receiving Christ in Eucharist, I was saying my prayer to Jesus declaring Him my personal and conscious choice of his person aloud in front of other participants. I was also thinking about the choice of Jesus as my personal Lord and King and I realized the fact that my choice is preceded by the choice by Jesus which he had done in the sacrament of baptism. After all, it was Jesus who chose me first. It was on the base of his choice that I can choose Him.
I make the decision of choosing Jesus as my PERSONAL Lord and Redeemer every day. Today, tomorrow, the day after tomorrow, my choice of Jesus is life with Him at work, at home, in developing one’s hobbies, in relationship with parents and brothers and sisters, in thinking about the future… I often think about life with Jesus, referring to marriage life which starts at the moment of contracting a marriage and ends at the moment of death of one of spouses. I like this comparison very much, because it seems to me that it can illustrate Jesus’ life in a very good way. The official choice of Jesus and decision connected with it, are only the beginning. The conscious choice of Jesus is also the beginning of the path, like the sacramental ‘yes’ of spouses being the beginning for their path. The longer I live with Jesus in a conscious way, the more convinced I become that the truthfulness of every decision is measured by faithfulness to it and for what I decided. Similarly as husband wants to give his life for his wife every day, no matter what circumstances are, and faithfulness to Jesus is choosing Him every day regardless of circumstances. Someone may ask: Darek, what does it mean to be faithful to Jesus every day? I want my faithfulness to be seen on three levels:
A prayer is the first determinant of my faithfulness to Jesus, confirming whether I really choose Him as my Lord and if he is the King in my life? As long as I pray, I choose Jesus, also accepting the choice which He did towards me. My faithfulness to the prayer is my care about Eucharist, adoration of the Blessed Sacrament, Divine Word which forms my way of thinking according to the Gospel, life in a community and being with my brothers at the prayer.
I see and I am delighted by how the Divine Word changes my thinking and allows me look at everyday life in Christ’ way, that is, see further than in a purely human way. I experience that faithful listening to Jesus’ Words allows me to look at myself, brothers and reality - through His eyes, see more than my eyes can see.
CONSENT TO HOW JESUS LEADS ME
This element of faithfulness to Jesus may be the most difficult because it is aimed against my ‘I’ and my pride the most. Saying ‘yes’ to Jesus is trustfulness more in Him than in myself. Jesus often leads me through a different path than the one which I chose for myself. Only from the perspective of time I see, discover and I am delighted by the fact that Jesus’ version is the best.
In my life of 27 years I have made many decisions. Some of them were difficult. Today I am sure that the decision of Jesus as my Lord and Redeemer is the best decision of my life. Certainly, my faithfulness to Jesus is not always exemplary. When I fall, I neglect my prayer or I want to realize my plans more than agree to the version of Jesus, then some anxiety and sadness usually accompany it. I also understand it as a grace that I can see my unfaithfulness because thanks to it I realize the fact that Jesus is waiting. Every choice of Jesus is a victory, making a step towards Heaven. I am grateful to Jesus that every day we can choose each other.